


fight the doubt & give you faith

by prettyboyrollins



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Be More Chill - Ned Vizinni
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Character Development, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-03-01
Packaged: 2019-11-07 08:21:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17957000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prettyboyrollins/pseuds/prettyboyrollins
Summary: They'd moved to New York City on a whim, desperate to escape the past and their parents.Brooke reflects on the past as they finally get their much-deserved fresh start.





	fight the doubt & give you faith

**Author's Note:**

  * For [selkiemaiden](https://archiveofourown.org/users/selkiemaiden/gifts).



> title from taylor swift's "ours" because it's 2013 apparently
> 
> this is dedicated to vicki, my partner in digital crimes, the rich to my brooke, the michael to my jeremy. consider this a late birthday present.
> 
> this is based in a modern, squip-less au. they're both in their 20s. also i'm with [ApocalypseOfTheFucked](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ApocalypseOfTheFucked/pseuds/ApocalypseOfTheFucked) on the ship name thing: we love Expensive Yogurt in this house.

There were still more boxes than actual pieces of furniture in their apartment, more than half of the stuff they’d picked up at IKEA still untouched against the far wall of what would eventually become the living room. They’d built a bookcase – that was easy enough, a good place to start, or at least that was their logic – and part of the afternoon had been spent unpacking the boxes of movies and books and her tiny little vinyl collection she’d started a year ago. The place was starting to _look_ like home; it had _felt_ like home the moment they’d closed the door and sat on the floor, kissing through Brooke’s happy tears. They were (very) slowly but surely making the place someplace two young adults lived.

Now, though, Brooke was in the kitchen, dancing to a playlist they’d made together when they’d first started dating – they’d kept adding onto it as time went on, and it was Brooke’s go-to most days. She was making pancakes for dinner, just because she could. She dumped some (okay, _way too many)_ chocolate chips into the bowl of batter, stirring them in as she shook her hips to the beat of the blink-182 song that was playing – a song Rich had picked out that she’d fallen in love with. It reminded her of late summer nights spent anywhere but at home; they’d driven out to the shore one night they’d both felt particularly bad, and they’d put this playlist on and sat on the hood of her car under the stars. They held hands quietly, neither of them really talking, until she’d mustered up the courage to say “I love you.”

They hooked up in the backseat shortly after that, and she definitely cried, and it was probably the best night of her life so far – not that that was a high bar to clear, but still. It was a great memory in an otherwise not-so-great time.

The song ended, and a Taylor Swift song came on – Rich loved Taylor Swift more than Brooke did, and it was one of the things on her very long list of Things Brooke Loves About Rich Goranski. She kept singing along, turning around to look at Rich, see if he was enjoying this as much as she was.

And when she did, she caught Rich staring at her with the most incredulous smile on his face.

_Oh, wow._

Her voice faded away, and the bowl of batter got forgotten for a moment; the Rich across the room from her wasn’t the Rich she went to high school with. His expression was soft and full of light and happiness in a way she’d never really get used to. For so long, Rich had always put up so many walls, surrounded himself with a cloud of standoffish anger, kept everyone at arm’s length if he didn’t push them away totally. She’d always been fine with that, being just _cool_ with Rich in high school; they weren’t all that alike, but he was funny, and he was never outright _mean_ to her. _Chloe_ was meaner to her, and that was her _best fucking friend._ But then The Fire had happened, and once Rich had come back to school, he’d been _different._ And she and Jake were the first ones to wrap him up in hugs and welcome him back to their table in the cafeteria.

Soft Rich was still a rare thing, right up until they started going on dates. But god, once she saw Soft Rich, she was _hooked._ It was moments like this, with him just smiling at her, that she was reminded that Rich’s Big Heart was one of the reasons she loved him more than anything. He had so much love to give, and he was finally starting to allow himself to do it. She wanted nothing more than to make Rich look that soft and happy and peaceful every day for the rest of forever.

Rich’s smile got a little bigger and he laughed. “Brooke, you good?”

It was then that she realized she’d been standing there, staring at him, half-mixed pancake batter in the bowl on her hip. “Oh, uh.” She put the bowl down on the counter next to her and nodded. “Yeah, just… thinking.”

“’Bout what?”

She took a few steps forward and placed one hand on his chest, the other cupping his cheek gently. “Just about how proud of you I am,” she said, voice soft as Taylor Swift played on. “You’re, like, so much lighter right now. And I know that that’s definitely a little bit because we’re out of fucking Jersey, but… you’ve been getting better for years now. And you’ve come so, so, _so_ far. If I didn’t know you, baby, I would think you and the old Rich were two totally different guys.”

With that, she leaned forward to give him a quick kiss; she hated bringing up Old Rich, and she always felt like she had to apologize for it somehow. She figured a couple soft kisses would help chase the horrible feelings that came with discussing the past away. “But I’m lucky enough that I _do_ know you, and I know how hard you’re trying. And you’re kicking _ass,_ Richie. Every single day you get better and you let that huge heart of yours shine through, and I just… really love you.” Brooke closed her eyes and took a deep breath, fighting back the tears that were definitely already threatening to fall. “You’re amazing. And I don’t want you forgetting that, okay?”

Rich kissed her, a little more forcefully than she had kissed him, and she melted into it. Rich was perfect for her; it was in the way that his hands settled on her hips and pulled her close, and the way he coaxed her mouth open to kiss her thoroughly for just a second before pulling away and leaving her wanting more. “I love you,” was all he managed to say, and she leaned forward to press their foreheads together. He mumbled it again, and Brooke swallowed it with a kiss of her own.

They stood there in their little bubble of peace until a loud Green Day song startled them both, and Brooke jumped out of her skin. Rich laughed at her, and she swiped at his chest but let him kiss her one more time. 

“C’mon,” she said, one of her hands slipping down to take Rich’s and tangle their fingers together. “Fuck unpacking - help me finish these pancakes so we can eat. The boxes’ll still be there later. Be domestic and gross with me for a little.”

Rich picked up the bowl of batter that they’d been ignoring, smiling that beautiful, soft smile at her and making her melt all over again. “Anything for you, babe.”

**Author's Note:**

> the songs that i reference are, in order:  
> \- [dysentery gary by blink-182](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQ45bHZd8Tw)  
> \- [ours by taylor swift](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZ34LlaIk88)  
> \- [delicate by taylor swift](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCXGJQYZ9JA)  
> \- [haushinka by green day](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWKzbsxiU88)
> 
> rich goranski deserves so much love and light in his life. brooke lohst also deserves so much light and love in her life. this ship is soft and gentle and i love it. thanks for coming to my ted talk.
> 
> let me know what you thought! i may write more for bmc if people dig it.


End file.
